I listened to this story the other day about a man being arrested during his honeymoon 🤵🏾👰🏽 in a police prostitution sting operation 😱? How sad ? The police said the man's wife fell asleep and he went online, click on an advertisement of a sex worker, which was really an undercover cop 👮🏽♀️, went to meet with the prostitute and got arrested. More than 100 people were arrested in the police operation. Now you have to say what a foolish and selfish man, and you are correct. But for the sake our topic we will do some speculations. The man is guilty of sin and marriage couldn't cure his sexual sins, but what about the wife 👰🏽? Could she have played a role in this 🤔?
It's either this man has a high sex drive or his wife wasn't in the mood to satisfy his needs. It could be after a long day, the wife said I'm tired, I am not in the mood, I have a headache 😩, I'm sleepy. And this man already a sex addict was overcomed by Satan's temptation. Now I'm not in anyway at all saying the wife was responsible but we do know from reports of many men that when it comes to sex they find their wives 👰🏽 not really interested and always coming up with a bunch of reasons not be sexually intimate. And many men blame their wives for their cheating 🙄, in truth no one is responsible for one's action, but our behaviors can influence the actions of another . Now it's clear that this guy was selfish, but its possible that his wife was also selfish .
Marriage is a union between 2 selfish people. Both people are trying to get the other to satisfy their own needs. When you ask a couple before they get married, why do you like your partner 🤔? The typical response is, he/she does things I like, make me happy etc.. it's never I like this person because I see things in them that want to help them develop, it's never I want to be with this person to help them grow, to help them become better. So even before we get into marriage the focus is on how will I benefit from this union. And in marriage when I feel like my needs are not being met, then out of my selfishness I look for ways to satisfy myself
When people are not satisfied in marriage, they may look toward sexual sins such as masturbation, pornography or even adultery to satisfy their selfish needs. And as we become more selfish we may look towards divorce 🤵🏾💔👰🏽 as the way out. We don't care about how much this affect the other person, how much it affects children, the extended family etc.. we are just trying to be happy and if the cost of my happiness means the destruction of others, so be it we conclude. This the result of selfish people getting married and friends all of us are selfish. We always think the other people are selfish and we are the good one.
The truth is if I wasn't selfish I wouldn't even see my spouse's flaws, for love covers a multitude of sins ❤. The fact that I see all of my spouse's flaws, while I ignore my own shows that I'm not loving but selfish. If I was loving, I would notice the flaws and yet focus on the positive, focus on how can I be the strength for my spouse's weakness. The greater her flaws, the more love I would see to show her, the more mercy I would seek to have for her, the more I would seek to be there for her, to provide a safe space for her to truly Express herself and be herself and for her to see I truly love her . When she sees that I love her and truth, then and only then she will seek to change
The design of marriage is not to cure our sins, but to reveal to us our own selfish nature, not your spouse's selfishness but your own selfish heart. And as you see how selfish and wicked you are, you would go to God and say Lord I am a selfish and wicked individual, please Lord, put love in my heart ❤, help me to love my spouse no matter what. Help me to love my spouse with all his/her flaws, help to be a blessing to my spouse, help me to be someone my spouse can trust, can rely on , help me to reflect your character in my marriage. This is the goal of marriage, to show you your great wickedness and your need of Christ.
It is no wonder that Jesus said because of the hardness of our hearts that Moses permitted us to divorce. To avoid 2 wicked people from killing each other , God allows divorce. If you had a divorce already and you didn't know these things, God can forgive you. But I want you to know that divorce which is only permitted in the case of adultery is evidence of selfishness and wicked hearts. So friends,let us go to God and ask Him to create in us a new heart and a right spirit. If you are married, pray, if you are not yet married pray that the Lord will remove selfishness in your hearts and give you a heart of love, a heart that put the needs of others first.
Matthew 19:8
He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so.
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