Love.
Love is something we all desire. The airwaves are filled with love songs. We find love in movies and literature, and these stories appear so beautiful to us.
The idea of love makes us feel good; just thinking about it awakens beautiful emotions in our hearts, and we wonder, "Why isn’t this my reality?" or "Why can't I find that kind of love?"
Love begins to feel difficult to find the moment we start believing, "I deserve love."
Do I deserve love?
It sounds crazy for me to ask that, right? You might ask, "What do you mean?" Or you might say, "Of course you deserve love."
But now, let me ask you: Why do you believe you deserve love?
What is it about you that makes you worthy of being loved?
You see, many times we say things without fully understanding their meaning—and as a result, we end up suffering.
What does the word "deserve" really mean?
The word "deserve," according to an online dictionary, means:
1. To do something, or have or show qualities, worthy of a reward or punishment.
In other words, to deserve something means you've done things that result in a certain outcome—like love—as a consequence.
So, let me ask you again:
Do you still believe you "deserve" love?
Do you believe you've done things that make you worthy of being loved?
But wait—hold your words.
Don’t answer just yet.
First, we must define what love is.
What is love?
According to the online dictionary, love is defined as “an intense feeling of deep affection.”
But then—what is affection?
Affection is described as a gentle feeling of fondness or liking.
And here, we begin to uncover the root of our struggle in finding love.
Most of us view love this way—as a feeling.
And because of that, love becomes as unstable as our emotions.
We fall in and out of love the way Florida weather changes—suddenly, unpredictably.
Our feelings fluctuate, and so does our love for one another.
This kind of love is emotionalism—the love of children.
It’s the love portrayed on the airwaves, in movies, in songs.
It’s the love most people seek, and yet, it’s so hard to find…
Because it isn’t real.
It isn’t sustainable.
We need to ask the question again and this time we will look for a better source.
Bible, what is love ?
Bible answers, " I am glad you ask."
Love is patient, love is kind. It doesn't envy, it doesn't boast, it is not proud. It doesn't dishonor others, it is not self seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love doesn't delight in evil but rejouces with the truth, it always protects, always trusts, always perseveres. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7
Thank you Bible . This is a much better definition. Now, I have something to work with. Back to the question at hand.
Do you think you deserve this love ?
Why do you believe you are worth it ?
I know you want to answer the question—but just wait a little longer.
I have one more question to ask.
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Does God "deserve" love?
You’ll probably say, “Yes.” Why does God "deserve" love?
You might answer, “My friend Ric, you should know that in 1 John 4:19–21, the scriptures clearly say, ‘We love Him because He first loved us.’”
Wow, wow, wow!
What an amazing response, my friend.
So, God deserves our love because He first pursued us with His love.
What a concept.
What a truth.
Essentially, God deserves something He has worked for, something He has demonstrated to others.
While a child deserves the love of his parents because they didn't ask to be made, love is trickier when it comes to other human relationships. Truth is its hard to claim to deserve anything we haven't worked for. You will say " I deserve God's love." I will answer yes. But do you " deserve " heaven ? The answer is " heaven is only reserved for those who pursue it." Likewise in human relationships and even in relationship with God, love will only be truly enjoyed by those who pursue it, not those who wait for love to come to them .
Whoever wants to be loved, who ever feels like they " deserve" to be loved must be active in loving others.
If I want to be loved, I must pursue love.
But how do I pursue love?
By going to its source—God.
How else do I pursue love?
By pursuing its attributes.
If I want someone to be patient with me,
I must pursue patience in myself.
If I want kindness from others,
I must be kind.
If I want others not to be easily angered with me,
I must pursue self-control.
If I want others to keep no record of my wrongs,
I must learn to keep no record of theirs.
If I want others to protect me,
I must pursue protecting them.
If I want trust,
I must build trust.
If I want others to persevere with me,
I must persevere with them.
Our society is full of "lazy lovers, dreamers." They want someone to come sweep them of their feet and enjoy the beauty of love, while they have done nothing "deserving" love. Love is an action verb and it requires efforts, persevering effort to find it.
A husband shouldn't wait for his wife to love him first ( submission, respect etc..) he should actively pursue after her to love her.
A wife shouldn't wait for her husband to love her first ( cherish, attention, affection etc..) she should actively pursue after him, to love him.
As both parties actively pursue after the other , love will blossom. Pursue after love from God and shower those around you with love, receive a harvest of love.
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